gordonmessmer (gordonmessmer) wrote,

The Plan

The Plan

In the beginning was The Plan.

And then came The Assumptions.

And The Assumptions were without form.

And The Plan was without substance.

And a terrible darkness fell upon the face of the Workers. And they spoke among themselves, saying "It is a crock of shit, and it stinks."

And the Workers went unto their Supervisors and said loudly "It is a bucket of dung, and we cannot live with the smell."

Whereupon the Supervisors went unto their Managers and didst say "It is a container of excrement, and it is very strong, such that none may abide by it."

The Managers went quickly up into the temple and seeing there the Directors of the company, went unto them, saying in pious voices "It is a vessel of fertiliser, and none may abide its strength."

After much feasting and lewd revellry, the Directors spoke among themselves, saying to one and other "It contains that which aids plant growth, and it is very strong."

And together the Directors went up onto the mount and finding there the Vice President, said gravely "It promotes growth, and it is very powerful."

Seizing upon this information the Vice President, went unto the President, saying, "This new Plan will actively promote the growth and vigour of the company with very powerful effects."

The President looked upon The Plan and saw that it was good.

And The Plan became Policy.

And this is how Shit Happens.

The plan always reminds me of my time at a nameless former employer. The biggest problem that I think we had was that the organization was too deep, and communication was filtered through too many layers. Upper management had no idea what was going on in the company, because they were entirely removed from actually talking to their employees.
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